I have been thinking about Mirror Neurons this week!
Why? Because I have had the great fortune to be able to provide some fill in daycare for my grandson, while his amazing daycare provider is away on holidays! (That is also why this blog is coming to you a little later in the week than normal… trying to keep up with a two year old is REAL!)
I am blown away by the amount of information he takes in, processes and imitates! Much of this learning is facilitated by mirror neurons!
Mirror neurons are a type of brain cell that play a significant role in the development of social and cognitive skills in young children. This specific kind of neuron fires in the brain when a little one observes an action and then mimics that action and performs it him/herself.
Mirror Neurons put a capital ‘BULLSHIT’ stamp on the saying “Do as I say… not as I do!” Nope, no way, absolutely not… our brains are not built like that! We fall more into the “Monkey see, monkey do” category!
That was so very evident to me yesterday… I was experiencing digestive issues, had low energy and not my normal level of coping skills. Guess what? My sweet little dude came right along on the ride with me… his appetite was a fraction of what it normally is, we did a lot of laying around reading and telling stories, and he was unusually fussy on and off all day.
I really tried to be chipper, excited, present and interested… but he was not buying it for a second! He knew his ‘Nanny” was AWOL and acted accordingly!
The whole experience made me remember being in high school and having a teacher or other adult give me heck for something or try to steer me in a certain behavioural direction… I remember thinking “Look! Your energy does not even match your words… you do not even believe your own crap!” And… I usually acted accordingly!
We are energetic beings projected into these physical bodies. We use mirror neurons to get up to speed with our environment. We learn to behave, speak, interact and move in ways that provide our best chance for survival and happiness.
We have three main times in our life when our brains go through major changes: Between 2 - 4 years old, during puberty and during menopause.
Between the ages of 2 and 4, the brain undergoes significant growth and development. There is a rapid increase in synaptic connections, peaking around age 3. This synaptic proliferation supports learning and the acquisition of new skills.
All of these new synaptic connections allow kids to be very present in the moment and able to adapt quickly and easily to things. The more experiences… the better! The least amount of stress & tension… the better! (This is one of the reasons kids can push your buttons like no one else… you are looking into a mirror of all of your best and worst traits.)
During puberty a process called ‘synaptic pruning’ takes place. The brain eliminates excess synaptic connections, making neural networks more efficient. This process helps fine-tune brain function based on individual experiences.
This fine-tuning of the brain is why teenagers become marauding narcissists. They are meant to spread their wings and fly so they can expand their experiences and help their brain mature. It HAS to be all about them… they are laying the foundations for the adult brain that will take them through the next 30 years. If their childhood environment has left some learning, behavioural or emotional gaps… now is the time to fill them in with new experiences!
When you meet their freak outs, lack of empathy or other shenanigans with calm, caring love… their mirror neurons take it all in and learn how to be a calm, caring adult.
During menopause, we experience the last major, scheduled brain change of our lives. Society would have us believe that these changes are NOT for the good… mood swings, fuzzy thinking, lack of memory and focus.
I disagree! Menopause is just another opportunity for our mirror neurons to expand our mental capacity… the same way that they did as a wee one and during puberty. The difference this time is that the ‘fuzzy thinking’ is designed to turn our attention and observations inward.
We are designed to be more in touch with what really matters to us after menopause… creative projects and long buried dreams! Our bodies act as incredibly accurate barometers that indicate how closely we are living our heart’s desires. When and if we settle back into our old mind and continue to fret, worry or complain… our bodies warn us that we are moving in the wrong direction with a hot flash or other menopausal symptom!
After spending the week with my little man, it became apparent to me that he is the perfect muse for my menopausal mirror neurons.
Observing my grandson’s undying presence in the moment, willingness to learn anything new, and delight in everything… has led me to a new understanding.
Successful menopause is about tuning my mirror neurons to observe the best things in life, and to then step forward with my actions from a place of wisdom, freedom and fun!
Basically… a big, happy kid, who dances like a teenager and is capable of deep thought! ❤️
Love,
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